Friday, June 09, 2006
Marriage; Passion, Fire and Desire
So I have decided to write about this regardless of what people may think. It's really long as you can see and if you don't want to read it, you totally don't have to - fine by me, please don't complain to me about it's length if you so choose to read it. My life is faced with decisions and choices as is everyone's, and I'm not looking for insight from anyone in this post, but I am sharing what's inside of me that I long for, that I have been thinking about throughout years....searching for something real, and I will find it the way it was meant to be - and that I can speak in Jesus' name. I wasn't going to share this, but I've wrote it in a way that I can share it. So without further adue, here it is - and I admire anyone who actually reads all of this!
I feel a fire. I feel a deep burning. I feel a longing. I feel desire. I have seen, saw and lived under the corruption of love. Corruption of marriage, corruption of relationship. Oh, how the soul is thirsty and longing; yearning for something real! Thirsty for what God says relationship is all about. For what the good Lord has set it out to be. Embark on a journey to find the true meaning of love; to see how marriage is directed and intertwined with the beauty of God. To see how marriage is a living example of the relationship God wants to have with you; with me. So we could walk into an inviting mystery, that we ought to come out knowing Him better.
We have been brought up, bombarded by false testimony, with vails over our eyes so thick we see things backwards than how they should be. Asking all the wrong questions, seeking all the wrong answers. Why is it that we have failed? Why is it that the body has failed just as much as the secular world? How scary it is for us who are young to have more failure as our role models, than success. To be believing for things we rarely see anyone else accomplish. How must we persevere to see the blessing of Christ, through our own mistakes. How we have to learn from the mistakes of those before us, that we might not make them. Because we’ll never really know what it’s like until we’re there, until we experience it for ourselves. But please, let us use wisdom, for God’s word says that if any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask for it... I rest my doubt in God above having thought, ‘if this wasn’t achievable, then God would not have asked it of us.’
I have a dream... of what I want my marriage to look like. Of course, marriage is not the final goal, it is not the main course in life, but simply an additive to the abundant life God has promised if only we would be so willing as to accept. Yet I cannot write off what lies in my heart, and I fully plan to utilize it, and use it to fight for what is right.
I’m deeply thankful for a couple like my older brother and his newly wedded wife. Never have I seen two people more in love. Where I talked to his wife on the phone a short while ago and asked how marriage was and her honest, warm, sincere reply was, ‘it’s awesome, everyday is like Christmas morning!’ Now of course they’re ‘just married’ but bare with me, I’ve seen couples who are ‘just married’ into the first year and it seems that they’ve been together forever. Their spice is gone, their flavour is gone, the fun seems to be mundane and no longer present. Why does the well dry up and have no more water?
I’m thankful that I have my parents to watch after nearly 30 years of marriage, and they enjoy each other still. Of course, they’re not perfect, of course they’ve made mistakes...yet I can see the smile on my dad’s face when he talks about how he looks forward to going on trips with my mother. How he warms inside and tells how he enjoys her. it’s warming. And he might not know, but I NEED it. I NEED them to love each other. I NEED them to enjoy each other’s precence and to show me and my brothers how we’re suppose to fight through, how we’re suppose to love our wives and cherish them. To respect them and treat them with honor. Because a woman is a special blessing, she truly is God’s final touch. Why can we not see our differences as beautiful, rather than a curse?
Companionship. Commitment. She and she alone I’ll be for. Love. Relationship. Friendship; deep friendship. Fun! Intimacy, in more ways than one. The intimacy of a soft kiss or a gentle touch. the intimacy of the little; the intimacy of the abundant. The gift to explore. I want to cherish her like I’ve never cherished someone before. (Which I also want my level of love for people to increase) I want to ENJOY her company and the essence of her beauty. I want to develop a friendship; a relationship so strong, so intimate that man cannot seperate it. That it may shake, but would never fall. God’s word says, ‘what the Lord has brought together, let man not seperate.’’ Divorce is simply not an option. My words are not doing the justice as my heart is speaking. I want to be head over heals in love, but not blindly in love. I want my marriage to succeed. I want it to thrive. I want my marriage to be blessed, I want my marriage to be saturated; perfumed with the love of God.
God as the head, always, every day, every moment. When days are rough, when days are smooth. Do we run from God because we have a bad day? We shouldn’t. Likewise, running from marriage when you have a bad day is equal. If God can lead me to be a man of God and my wife a woman of God, as Him as the head, ALWAYS, then who can rise against that? Sure, it’ll be challenged, but if it’s firm, it should not fall. Ever.
I believe in marriage; I am eagerly anticipating the day, the entire process, the entire journey. I am excited for it; for it see it’s beauty. I am excited for the companionship, for the union with my best friend. Yet I am not impatient for it, just excited about it!
I believe that it can be achieved and enjoyed! Not that you’ll crawl across the finish line with little air left in your lungs, torn clothes, barely any energy, but rather... dance across the finish line with my wife. Together, hand in hand, smiles on our faces, lit up like the sun because you made it. Because you loved each other, through thick, through thin. Through sickness or disease. Oh, how I need Jesus so strongly to achieve this kind of love. But things is... I believe it. I believe in it. I believe it exists because God exists. Because our love can never go too deep. We can’t match the love of the Father. Learn from our mistakes. Use our mistakes to grow together and with each other.
I have no doubt in my mind that marriage will be ‘hard’, but I would like to believe ‘at times’ that would be true, for if it were true always, why would anyone want to go through with it? Should marriage not be a blessing to be with someone you love? Someone you cherish and enjoy being around? Everything in life requires balance and moderation. Why is it that so few people seem to be able to do this? What is the difference between those who quit and those who persevere?
I don’t want to be afraid, I don’t want to back down, the risk is worth it. I heard a phrase, ‘the worst thing you can do in life is marry the wrong person.’ Use your head, present to God, use common sense, use advice from others, use guidance from mature, Godly sources. Do you mesh? Do you connect? Do you have fun? Are your interests the same? Where are you both going in life? What are your passions? I’m seeing that the most important factor is how you mesh; how you connect. If you’re both on the same level; on the same page.
I’ve rested on the fact that I won’t be told flat out by God who my wife is; that it won’t be that easy to figure it out, and quite frankly, I am not interested in finding out that way. The journey and challenge of figuring this out for yourself is actually fun and exciting. It’s thrilling. Like ripping a piece of paper off of a present from under the Christmas tree on Christmas eve. Just to take a peek, but not knowing what’s inside. Or the light shining over a hilltop, teasing you before it finally reveals itsself; all light warming your face. Surely God is great! Surely God DESIRES blessing for us, it’s written all throughout His word. So should it be as hard as they say? Should it be so rough that it almost doesn’t sound appealing? I refuse to accept that it will be labelled as ‘hard’ but I would rather label it as ‘an adventure waiting to be tapped into it’.
I pray for blessing, I’ll walk with my Lord, and full well know I don’t deserve it, but what do I have in life that I DID deserve? nothing. I deserved to be on that cross that day. Bloodied and bruised. One last breath in my lungs asking God why he forsakened me. So I full well know God wants this, that he delights in this. I look to him who is First and will always remain first in my life. Above my wife, above my own desires. It is a process to be learned. a liftetime to be corrected and taught. He’s a good God, definately. My life, I will live for you Lord, and this desire for a fresh view, a fresh understanding the way YOU see it, the way YOU want it, thrives in my soul. It will birth and providing I stick with my eyes on my God, always, as does my wife, together, we’ll take a journey in life, enjoying the moments, for there’ll be many of them. to love and cherish, to minister together. to cry together, to laugh together, to dance together. This is beautiful, this is intimate. A triangle of intimacy.... I delight in this....
Realization has set in. To feel these passions , seeing that God has given me wisdom and revelation of that on a higher level than I’ve known before. God has allowed me to see a higher standard of living in relationship, in life, and I know there’s even more beyond the horizon. I know I must keep my eyes on God above, but the passion is real and true and healthy. It is right. For marriage is not what life is about, but as I am nearing an age of the option becoming more probably and realistic, I cant help but see what I need to do to prepare. The only reason I have what I have is because God has granted it to me. I thirst for more and the only reason that is because God has showed me a higher level. I am EXTREMELY grateful for what’s been given and taught to me up to this point and I will pursue. God is a good, an awesome God! God, Father, be the head, lead me and guide me to the life you have for me. to the way you want me to live. I’m grateful and thankful. joyus! and humbled! thank-you to the Father, who is glorious above!
I feel a fire. I feel a deep burning. I feel a longing. I feel desire. I have seen, saw and lived under the corruption of love. Corruption of marriage, corruption of relationship. Oh, how the soul is thirsty and longing; yearning for something real! Thirsty for what God says relationship is all about. For what the good Lord has set it out to be. Embark on a journey to find the true meaning of love; to see how marriage is directed and intertwined with the beauty of God. To see how marriage is a living example of the relationship God wants to have with you; with me. So we could walk into an inviting mystery, that we ought to come out knowing Him better.
We have been brought up, bombarded by false testimony, with vails over our eyes so thick we see things backwards than how they should be. Asking all the wrong questions, seeking all the wrong answers. Why is it that we have failed? Why is it that the body has failed just as much as the secular world? How scary it is for us who are young to have more failure as our role models, than success. To be believing for things we rarely see anyone else accomplish. How must we persevere to see the blessing of Christ, through our own mistakes. How we have to learn from the mistakes of those before us, that we might not make them. Because we’ll never really know what it’s like until we’re there, until we experience it for ourselves. But please, let us use wisdom, for God’s word says that if any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask for it... I rest my doubt in God above having thought, ‘if this wasn’t achievable, then God would not have asked it of us.’
I have a dream... of what I want my marriage to look like. Of course, marriage is not the final goal, it is not the main course in life, but simply an additive to the abundant life God has promised if only we would be so willing as to accept. Yet I cannot write off what lies in my heart, and I fully plan to utilize it, and use it to fight for what is right.
I’m deeply thankful for a couple like my older brother and his newly wedded wife. Never have I seen two people more in love. Where I talked to his wife on the phone a short while ago and asked how marriage was and her honest, warm, sincere reply was, ‘it’s awesome, everyday is like Christmas morning!’ Now of course they’re ‘just married’ but bare with me, I’ve seen couples who are ‘just married’ into the first year and it seems that they’ve been together forever. Their spice is gone, their flavour is gone, the fun seems to be mundane and no longer present. Why does the well dry up and have no more water?
I’m thankful that I have my parents to watch after nearly 30 years of marriage, and they enjoy each other still. Of course, they’re not perfect, of course they’ve made mistakes...yet I can see the smile on my dad’s face when he talks about how he looks forward to going on trips with my mother. How he warms inside and tells how he enjoys her. it’s warming. And he might not know, but I NEED it. I NEED them to love each other. I NEED them to enjoy each other’s precence and to show me and my brothers how we’re suppose to fight through, how we’re suppose to love our wives and cherish them. To respect them and treat them with honor. Because a woman is a special blessing, she truly is God’s final touch. Why can we not see our differences as beautiful, rather than a curse?
Companionship. Commitment. She and she alone I’ll be for. Love. Relationship. Friendship; deep friendship. Fun! Intimacy, in more ways than one. The intimacy of a soft kiss or a gentle touch. the intimacy of the little; the intimacy of the abundant. The gift to explore. I want to cherish her like I’ve never cherished someone before. (Which I also want my level of love for people to increase) I want to ENJOY her company and the essence of her beauty. I want to develop a friendship; a relationship so strong, so intimate that man cannot seperate it. That it may shake, but would never fall. God’s word says, ‘what the Lord has brought together, let man not seperate.’’ Divorce is simply not an option. My words are not doing the justice as my heart is speaking. I want to be head over heals in love, but not blindly in love. I want my marriage to succeed. I want it to thrive. I want my marriage to be blessed, I want my marriage to be saturated; perfumed with the love of God.
God as the head, always, every day, every moment. When days are rough, when days are smooth. Do we run from God because we have a bad day? We shouldn’t. Likewise, running from marriage when you have a bad day is equal. If God can lead me to be a man of God and my wife a woman of God, as Him as the head, ALWAYS, then who can rise against that? Sure, it’ll be challenged, but if it’s firm, it should not fall. Ever.
I believe in marriage; I am eagerly anticipating the day, the entire process, the entire journey. I am excited for it; for it see it’s beauty. I am excited for the companionship, for the union with my best friend. Yet I am not impatient for it, just excited about it!
I believe that it can be achieved and enjoyed! Not that you’ll crawl across the finish line with little air left in your lungs, torn clothes, barely any energy, but rather... dance across the finish line with my wife. Together, hand in hand, smiles on our faces, lit up like the sun because you made it. Because you loved each other, through thick, through thin. Through sickness or disease. Oh, how I need Jesus so strongly to achieve this kind of love. But things is... I believe it. I believe in it. I believe it exists because God exists. Because our love can never go too deep. We can’t match the love of the Father. Learn from our mistakes. Use our mistakes to grow together and with each other.
I have no doubt in my mind that marriage will be ‘hard’, but I would like to believe ‘at times’ that would be true, for if it were true always, why would anyone want to go through with it? Should marriage not be a blessing to be with someone you love? Someone you cherish and enjoy being around? Everything in life requires balance and moderation. Why is it that so few people seem to be able to do this? What is the difference between those who quit and those who persevere?
I don’t want to be afraid, I don’t want to back down, the risk is worth it. I heard a phrase, ‘the worst thing you can do in life is marry the wrong person.’ Use your head, present to God, use common sense, use advice from others, use guidance from mature, Godly sources. Do you mesh? Do you connect? Do you have fun? Are your interests the same? Where are you both going in life? What are your passions? I’m seeing that the most important factor is how you mesh; how you connect. If you’re both on the same level; on the same page.
I’ve rested on the fact that I won’t be told flat out by God who my wife is; that it won’t be that easy to figure it out, and quite frankly, I am not interested in finding out that way. The journey and challenge of figuring this out for yourself is actually fun and exciting. It’s thrilling. Like ripping a piece of paper off of a present from under the Christmas tree on Christmas eve. Just to take a peek, but not knowing what’s inside. Or the light shining over a hilltop, teasing you before it finally reveals itsself; all light warming your face. Surely God is great! Surely God DESIRES blessing for us, it’s written all throughout His word. So should it be as hard as they say? Should it be so rough that it almost doesn’t sound appealing? I refuse to accept that it will be labelled as ‘hard’ but I would rather label it as ‘an adventure waiting to be tapped into it’.
I pray for blessing, I’ll walk with my Lord, and full well know I don’t deserve it, but what do I have in life that I DID deserve? nothing. I deserved to be on that cross that day. Bloodied and bruised. One last breath in my lungs asking God why he forsakened me. So I full well know God wants this, that he delights in this. I look to him who is First and will always remain first in my life. Above my wife, above my own desires. It is a process to be learned. a liftetime to be corrected and taught. He’s a good God, definately. My life, I will live for you Lord, and this desire for a fresh view, a fresh understanding the way YOU see it, the way YOU want it, thrives in my soul. It will birth and providing I stick with my eyes on my God, always, as does my wife, together, we’ll take a journey in life, enjoying the moments, for there’ll be many of them. to love and cherish, to minister together. to cry together, to laugh together, to dance together. This is beautiful, this is intimate. A triangle of intimacy.... I delight in this....
Realization has set in. To feel these passions , seeing that God has given me wisdom and revelation of that on a higher level than I’ve known before. God has allowed me to see a higher standard of living in relationship, in life, and I know there’s even more beyond the horizon. I know I must keep my eyes on God above, but the passion is real and true and healthy. It is right. For marriage is not what life is about, but as I am nearing an age of the option becoming more probably and realistic, I cant help but see what I need to do to prepare. The only reason I have what I have is because God has granted it to me. I thirst for more and the only reason that is because God has showed me a higher level. I am EXTREMELY grateful for what’s been given and taught to me up to this point and I will pursue. God is a good, an awesome God! God, Father, be the head, lead me and guide me to the life you have for me. to the way you want me to live. I’m grateful and thankful. joyus! and humbled! thank-you to the Father, who is glorious above!
// posted by JP @ 11:53 a.m. 
Comments:
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I like that you took my hearts cry and put it on paper! You have an amazing way with words! This brought tears of joy to my eyes! Its sad that more men aren't as thrilled about marriage... a lot just veiw it as a 'ball and chain' something they do to get to the one goal in their heads! Yes its sad, but all to unfortunatly true! I pray that one day more men would be more passionate about marriage and that we would see more and more marriages healthy so our kids dont have to push and struggle to find out what a healthy relationship is but they would just see it through the examples around them! My heart leaps for joy! Incandecently wonderful in every way... some parts even reminded me of vows... excellent stuff Josh! Be blessed!
ok, you're going to hate me for saying this...but it WAS long...but it was a long blog worth reading. like dawn said, you have a way with words, and that made it all the better. i enjoyed every word of it, hearing all that from a guy's perspective is amazing! be blessed josh!!
wow that took me a long time to read but I read it all...my dreams are more important to me right now so marriage is not on the top of my list...but great post and I pray that your dreams come true
relationship and marriage is almost always a common topic amongst people our age. Just don't notice it till your in that group :)
It tastes like grapes. purple grapes. And I also like that taste! Or cherry.. so... the taste of red.
But I can't say I would enjoy sticking my tongue to 'frozen' things.... mabye somethin else that wouldn't hurt me, but would bug someone else ;)
But I can't say I would enjoy sticking my tongue to 'frozen' things.... mabye somethin else that wouldn't hurt me, but would bug someone else ;)
once when i lived in SK i stuck my tongue to a gate and got my tongue stuck...and then my mom's friend went to get warm milk to pour on my tongue to get it off...i really didn't like milk then, so i ended up ripping my tongue off the stupid gate myself...i blame the whole thing on the gate and warm milk
ooooooooo I cringe at the thought of flesh ripping off of a tongue - that's friggen' nasty... I stuck my tongue on a chain link fence in the winter once but I think it got more pinched between two peices then it did froze. I also pulled it off, and DID loose some flesh.. Never did that again
Knock Knock....
who's there?....
write an update...
write an update who?...
write an update Josh!!!
who's there?....
write an update...
write an update who?...
write an update Josh!!!
# posted by 
: 12:16 a.m., June 14, 2006
: 12:16 a.m., June 14, 2006
Josh, this was a really well written post. It is great to see someone who is excited about marriage, but also wants to not settle with an okay relationship. We need more men in the world like that!
Mary
Mary
Great post, definitly worth reading....
I think a few ladies hearts melted from the one bit.. who doesn't desire to be charished like that?
Mmm...
Praying that you continue to learn and grow... some ladies going to be very lucky, Lord willing.
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I think a few ladies hearts melted from the one bit.. who doesn't desire to be charished like that?
Mmm...
Praying that you continue to learn and grow... some ladies going to be very lucky, Lord willing.
# posted by : 6:53 a.m., June 20, 2006
: 6:53 a.m., June 20, 2006 Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
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