Tuesday, February 06, 2007
Something Changed!
So it's been awhile... We're already one month into the new year, only 11 more months left! I was thinking back on my January and wow... what a difficult month, in fact, even Feb is looking like it will be a difficult month. There's been so much happening, life is just constantly shifting around me.
About mid January I started to feel disconnected with everything. The foundations of my life began to shake and I didn't really feel like I had a firm place to put my feet on. (Obviously, God is the answer, but don't get all spiritual on me now!) To put it into words it's like feeling restless on a Sunday afternoon when you're so bored but don't know what to do with yourself. Or when you're trying to go to sleep and no matter what you do, you just can't. So you're tossing and turning until it becomes frustrating. That's how I've been feeling. Just wanting ...something... just not knowing what that 'something' is. So it was on this past Friday that life took about a 180 degree change...
My job began to get immensly boring because there just isn't enough work for a full 8.5 hours for me to do and I become feeling like a bad employee because I can't find work to do. Considering I don't really know where I want to be at the moment, I do know I have a few passions and how can I go wrong with pursuing those? I've always said I would rather work for little or no pay to be at a job I love being at, rather than work at a job I hate, making lots of money. Blatantly honest, I've never cared how much money I'll make compared to the condition of my heart at any working environment. It's just not even a question.
So I walked into my boss' office on Friday and spent nearly 10 minutes convicing him to switch me to part time and it didn't take much. Full time for me was a waste of his money and my time. So it was done! On Monday I walked in at 10am and left at 2pm and it felt great! I got some time to just do some things for me, spend some decent time with God and not feel like my day is a complete rush from one activity to the next.
It feels good to be able to breathe.. although, there's quite abit more going on that's changing than just this, but it's helping me once again practice trusting God.. and keeping my eyes on Him. It's scary though... coming to the top of a mountain and having no clue what's on the other side, how big, long, wide, tall, difficult, painful, loving, etc. There is no sense of knowledge of what's over the horizon and I'm not so sure I like that but I can say that I AM fully confident that God has His hand all over my life and He'll take me where I need to go.
About mid January I started to feel disconnected with everything. The foundations of my life began to shake and I didn't really feel like I had a firm place to put my feet on. (Obviously, God is the answer, but don't get all spiritual on me now!) To put it into words it's like feeling restless on a Sunday afternoon when you're so bored but don't know what to do with yourself. Or when you're trying to go to sleep and no matter what you do, you just can't. So you're tossing and turning until it becomes frustrating. That's how I've been feeling. Just wanting ...something... just not knowing what that 'something' is. So it was on this past Friday that life took about a 180 degree change...
My job began to get immensly boring because there just isn't enough work for a full 8.5 hours for me to do and I become feeling like a bad employee because I can't find work to do. Considering I don't really know where I want to be at the moment, I do know I have a few passions and how can I go wrong with pursuing those? I've always said I would rather work for little or no pay to be at a job I love being at, rather than work at a job I hate, making lots of money. Blatantly honest, I've never cared how much money I'll make compared to the condition of my heart at any working environment. It's just not even a question.
So I walked into my boss' office on Friday and spent nearly 10 minutes convicing him to switch me to part time and it didn't take much. Full time for me was a waste of his money and my time. So it was done! On Monday I walked in at 10am and left at 2pm and it felt great! I got some time to just do some things for me, spend some decent time with God and not feel like my day is a complete rush from one activity to the next.
It feels good to be able to breathe.. although, there's quite abit more going on that's changing than just this, but it's helping me once again practice trusting God.. and keeping my eyes on Him. It's scary though... coming to the top of a mountain and having no clue what's on the other side, how big, long, wide, tall, difficult, painful, loving, etc. There is no sense of knowledge of what's over the horizon and I'm not so sure I like that but I can say that I AM fully confident that God has His hand all over my life and He'll take me where I need to go.
Labels: News
// posted by JP @ 4:30 p.m. 
Comments:
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Drowning in life can suck.... good for you to take such said leap of faith, i hope and pray that God directs your path and opens your eyes to opportunities that you never thought you would have! Blessings and love!
hey, that's cool! part time is going to be good...but I may be biased because that's all I'm working right now! :) Blessings, Josh!
Hey there little guy. I think your sexy even if you only work part time. Err.. I mean.. Let's go shoot.. stuff..?
Yes life can be hard sometimes. Good for you for trusting God. I've felt that way sometimes too...the bored feeling of not sure what you want but know it's something. I pray that God would continue to guide you and open doors in your life. I pray an abundance of blessing over you and that when you do what you love and are walking in the will of God that you will not need to worry about finances, but that God will supply all your needs! I pray that He will give you an abundance of wisdom and discernment as you journey into new waters! Keep up the good work!
Glad to hear about the part-time thing Josh. Being bored at work totally sucks...so glad you're able to move your schedule around!
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