Wednesday, June 21, 2006
Out of Office!
Good day! Well, as most people would have known I'm off to the ranch tomorrow for 2 months. We'll be back in on weekends but there won't be much time for anything as we're required to be back out at the ranch Sunday by 1 pm. Sooooo things will be a tad bit busy - but I'm greatly looking forward to what God is going to do in and through my life out there. So if you could, could you pray for all us staff, a protective covering, for wisdom and revelation, for strength, for anything you feel lead to pray - we all really need it and as you pray I'd pray for God to bless you too. Here's to the summer of 2006, God's gonna roxors our soxors!! Thanks, blessings and we'll see you all soon!!
P.S. Like the pic? *here's to lookin' at you, kid!*
Thursday, June 15, 2006
How Often...
Some thoughts came to mind, birthed from music and 'feeling' of a day. Wanted to share.
How often…
…do I loose sight of you?
…am I distracted, that my eyes wander to catch a glimpse of quick pleasure?
…have I prostituted myself away from the warmth of your loving hands into the cold hands of death?
…do you allow me back after I’ve cheated on you?
…beauty disguises itself, but death cannot hide its violent face for long…
…do I loose my momentum?
…do I fail and fall short?
…do I run dry?
…does my mind stray?
…am I unworthy?
…do you redeem me?
…do I cry out?
…do I deceive myself?
…have I turned on you?
…do I evolve my prayers around myself?
…am I a hypocrite?
…am I shaken by the wind?
…am I humbled standing in your midst?
…am I thankful?
…am I obedient?
...do you tell me you love me?
…do you teach me?
…do you uplift and uphold me?
…have you fought for me?
…have you given?
…have you turned to me?
…and undeserving am I?
…do I see your grace and your mercy?
...do I see your beauty?
…do I see your peace?
…do I see your undeserved blessing?
…I am deeply thankful
…I am humbled
…I am grateful
…do I loose sight of you?
…am I distracted, that my eyes wander to catch a glimpse of quick pleasure?
…have I prostituted myself away from the warmth of your loving hands into the cold hands of death?
…do you allow me back after I’ve cheated on you?
…beauty disguises itself, but death cannot hide its violent face for long…
…do I loose my momentum?
…do I fail and fall short?
…do I run dry?
…does my mind stray?
…am I unworthy?
…do you redeem me?
…do I cry out?
…do I deceive myself?
…have I turned on you?
…do I evolve my prayers around myself?
…am I a hypocrite?
…am I shaken by the wind?
…am I humbled standing in your midst?
…am I thankful?
…am I obedient?
...do you tell me you love me?
…do you teach me?
…do you uplift and uphold me?
…have you fought for me?
…have you given?
…have you turned to me?
…and undeserving am I?
…do I see your grace and your mercy?
...do I see your beauty?
…do I see your peace?
…do I see your undeserved blessing?
…I am deeply thankful
…I am humbled
…I am grateful
Wednesday, June 14, 2006
Adventure; Unknown Charted Territory
T Minus one week
Departure - headed down a charted road but has not been seen by my eyes, every experience different for the traveler. Excitement rising, pulse accelerates, live the thrill of walking into unknown territory; peace at my side. Hoping and waiting. Only an assumption can be made of the general concept and outcome of the undertaking.
Fill me up, make me new; make me more like you. Let us be focused on the goal, focused on the field of harvest, not on each other, not on ourselves, not on the tools we use, not on our hungry, empty stomachs.
Prepare the hearts, make gold out of coal. Peel off calloused tissue. Prune the crop of the field.
D-Day is approaching and we're going to war. This war I cannot die in, this war is for the lives of others, not for my own freedom. That war has come and passed; that war has been won victoriously! Time to fight for those who don't know, those who NEED to know.
The adventure is coming, and who knows what it will bring in the outcome, but if your hand is behind this than your word will not be mocked. Romans 8:28, one more promise the good, good Lord has promised, shall come to pass.
I welcome challenge, although I might not agree in the moment of the circumstance once arrives... I'm looking forward to learning about people, about ministry, about God, about kids, about friends, about relationship. This summer will be full; this summer is what I've needed, what I've been missing.
These next few days are final preparation, spiritually, physically. Rest and relaxation, minimized stress, peace everlasting. I took the time out to ride in the bliss, enjoying what was made 'for me' - ground my thoughts, ground my life, bring it all back to you. Thank-you for teaching and showing me how to simply 'enjoy' your gifts in life. The simple things, the little things. The greenery of the trees. Their lush beauty, swaying with the wind. A graceful river, highlighted, accented by city life. By the beauty of an architectural bridge. By the variety of smells in the air. The warm wind on your face, the deer that stare at me, afraid of me, as I go by. For the pink shade in the sunset, as the clouds wrap themselves into the bare sky to paint a picture. For the land to be laid out, with its hills and curves, winding together, colliding; decorated with bushes, shrubs and trees of all sizes; of different shades and colors; wild flowers. This is a small paradise.
Your will be done this summer, in your people, in this place, and with everyone else back in the cities; back in the homes with their jobs. In their lives. Water your seeds this summer, enable them to flourish. Speak forth their bloom. Keep our feet on level ground, let us not forget, let us never loose sight of you and why we're here, why we're in these moments we're in. Let me never forget, let my tongue always give thanks and give praise.
You are why I am created - hold us near - thank you your majesty, that you are Lord. Shalome.
Friday, June 09, 2006
Marriage; Passion, Fire and Desire
So I have decided to write about this regardless of what people may think. It's really long as you can see and if you don't want to read it, you totally don't have to - fine by me, please don't complain to me about it's length if you so choose to read it. My life is faced with decisions and choices as is everyone's, and I'm not looking for insight from anyone in this post, but I am sharing what's inside of me that I long for, that I have been thinking about throughout years....searching for something real, and I will find it the way it was meant to be - and that I can speak in Jesus' name. I wasn't going to share this, but I've wrote it in a way that I can share it. So without further adue, here it is - and I admire anyone who actually reads all of this!
I feel a fire. I feel a deep burning. I feel a longing. I feel desire. I have seen, saw and lived under the corruption of love. Corruption of marriage, corruption of relationship. Oh, how the soul is thirsty and longing; yearning for something real! Thirsty for what God says relationship is all about. For what the good Lord has set it out to be. Embark on a journey to find the true meaning of love; to see how marriage is directed and intertwined with the beauty of God. To see how marriage is a living example of the relationship God wants to have with you; with me. So we could walk into an inviting mystery, that we ought to come out knowing Him better.
We have been brought up, bombarded by false testimony, with vails over our eyes so thick we see things backwards than how they should be. Asking all the wrong questions, seeking all the wrong answers. Why is it that we have failed? Why is it that the body has failed just as much as the secular world? How scary it is for us who are young to have more failure as our role models, than success. To be believing for things we rarely see anyone else accomplish. How must we persevere to see the blessing of Christ, through our own mistakes. How we have to learn from the mistakes of those before us, that we might not make them. Because we’ll never really know what it’s like until we’re there, until we experience it for ourselves. But please, let us use wisdom, for God’s word says that if any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask for it... I rest my doubt in God above having thought, ‘if this wasn’t achievable, then God would not have asked it of us.’
I have a dream... of what I want my marriage to look like. Of course, marriage is not the final goal, it is not the main course in life, but simply an additive to the abundant life God has promised if only we would be so willing as to accept. Yet I cannot write off what lies in my heart, and I fully plan to utilize it, and use it to fight for what is right.
I’m deeply thankful for a couple like my older brother and his newly wedded wife. Never have I seen two people more in love. Where I talked to his wife on the phone a short while ago and asked how marriage was and her honest, warm, sincere reply was, ‘it’s awesome, everyday is like Christmas morning!’ Now of course they’re ‘just married’ but bare with me, I’ve seen couples who are ‘just married’ into the first year and it seems that they’ve been together forever. Their spice is gone, their flavour is gone, the fun seems to be mundane and no longer present. Why does the well dry up and have no more water?
I’m thankful that I have my parents to watch after nearly 30 years of marriage, and they enjoy each other still. Of course, they’re not perfect, of course they’ve made mistakes...yet I can see the smile on my dad’s face when he talks about how he looks forward to going on trips with my mother. How he warms inside and tells how he enjoys her. it’s warming. And he might not know, but I NEED it. I NEED them to love each other. I NEED them to enjoy each other’s precence and to show me and my brothers how we’re suppose to fight through, how we’re suppose to love our wives and cherish them. To respect them and treat them with honor. Because a woman is a special blessing, she truly is God’s final touch. Why can we not see our differences as beautiful, rather than a curse?
Companionship. Commitment. She and she alone I’ll be for. Love. Relationship. Friendship; deep friendship. Fun! Intimacy, in more ways than one. The intimacy of a soft kiss or a gentle touch. the intimacy of the little; the intimacy of the abundant. The gift to explore. I want to cherish her like I’ve never cherished someone before. (Which I also want my level of love for people to increase) I want to ENJOY her company and the essence of her beauty. I want to develop a friendship; a relationship so strong, so intimate that man cannot seperate it. That it may shake, but would never fall. God’s word says, ‘what the Lord has brought together, let man not seperate.’’ Divorce is simply not an option. My words are not doing the justice as my heart is speaking. I want to be head over heals in love, but not blindly in love. I want my marriage to succeed. I want it to thrive. I want my marriage to be blessed, I want my marriage to be saturated; perfumed with the love of God.
God as the head, always, every day, every moment. When days are rough, when days are smooth. Do we run from God because we have a bad day? We shouldn’t. Likewise, running from marriage when you have a bad day is equal. If God can lead me to be a man of God and my wife a woman of God, as Him as the head, ALWAYS, then who can rise against that? Sure, it’ll be challenged, but if it’s firm, it should not fall. Ever.
I believe in marriage; I am eagerly anticipating the day, the entire process, the entire journey. I am excited for it; for it see it’s beauty. I am excited for the companionship, for the union with my best friend. Yet I am not impatient for it, just excited about it!
I believe that it can be achieved and enjoyed! Not that you’ll crawl across the finish line with little air left in your lungs, torn clothes, barely any energy, but rather... dance across the finish line with my wife. Together, hand in hand, smiles on our faces, lit up like the sun because you made it. Because you loved each other, through thick, through thin. Through sickness or disease. Oh, how I need Jesus so strongly to achieve this kind of love. But things is... I believe it. I believe in it. I believe it exists because God exists. Because our love can never go too deep. We can’t match the love of the Father. Learn from our mistakes. Use our mistakes to grow together and with each other.
I have no doubt in my mind that marriage will be ‘hard’, but I would like to believe ‘at times’ that would be true, for if it were true always, why would anyone want to go through with it? Should marriage not be a blessing to be with someone you love? Someone you cherish and enjoy being around? Everything in life requires balance and moderation. Why is it that so few people seem to be able to do this? What is the difference between those who quit and those who persevere?
I don’t want to be afraid, I don’t want to back down, the risk is worth it. I heard a phrase, ‘the worst thing you can do in life is marry the wrong person.’ Use your head, present to God, use common sense, use advice from others, use guidance from mature, Godly sources. Do you mesh? Do you connect? Do you have fun? Are your interests the same? Where are you both going in life? What are your passions? I’m seeing that the most important factor is how you mesh; how you connect. If you’re both on the same level; on the same page.
I’ve rested on the fact that I won’t be told flat out by God who my wife is; that it won’t be that easy to figure it out, and quite frankly, I am not interested in finding out that way. The journey and challenge of figuring this out for yourself is actually fun and exciting. It’s thrilling. Like ripping a piece of paper off of a present from under the Christmas tree on Christmas eve. Just to take a peek, but not knowing what’s inside. Or the light shining over a hilltop, teasing you before it finally reveals itsself; all light warming your face. Surely God is great! Surely God DESIRES blessing for us, it’s written all throughout His word. So should it be as hard as they say? Should it be so rough that it almost doesn’t sound appealing? I refuse to accept that it will be labelled as ‘hard’ but I would rather label it as ‘an adventure waiting to be tapped into it’.
I pray for blessing, I’ll walk with my Lord, and full well know I don’t deserve it, but what do I have in life that I DID deserve? nothing. I deserved to be on that cross that day. Bloodied and bruised. One last breath in my lungs asking God why he forsakened me. So I full well know God wants this, that he delights in this. I look to him who is First and will always remain first in my life. Above my wife, above my own desires. It is a process to be learned. a liftetime to be corrected and taught. He’s a good God, definately. My life, I will live for you Lord, and this desire for a fresh view, a fresh understanding the way YOU see it, the way YOU want it, thrives in my soul. It will birth and providing I stick with my eyes on my God, always, as does my wife, together, we’ll take a journey in life, enjoying the moments, for there’ll be many of them. to love and cherish, to minister together. to cry together, to laugh together, to dance together. This is beautiful, this is intimate. A triangle of intimacy.... I delight in this....
Realization has set in. To feel these passions , seeing that God has given me wisdom and revelation of that on a higher level than I’ve known before. God has allowed me to see a higher standard of living in relationship, in life, and I know there’s even more beyond the horizon. I know I must keep my eyes on God above, but the passion is real and true and healthy. It is right. For marriage is not what life is about, but as I am nearing an age of the option becoming more probably and realistic, I cant help but see what I need to do to prepare. The only reason I have what I have is because God has granted it to me. I thirst for more and the only reason that is because God has showed me a higher level. I am EXTREMELY grateful for what’s been given and taught to me up to this point and I will pursue. God is a good, an awesome God! God, Father, be the head, lead me and guide me to the life you have for me. to the way you want me to live. I’m grateful and thankful. joyus! and humbled! thank-you to the Father, who is glorious above!
I feel a fire. I feel a deep burning. I feel a longing. I feel desire. I have seen, saw and lived under the corruption of love. Corruption of marriage, corruption of relationship. Oh, how the soul is thirsty and longing; yearning for something real! Thirsty for what God says relationship is all about. For what the good Lord has set it out to be. Embark on a journey to find the true meaning of love; to see how marriage is directed and intertwined with the beauty of God. To see how marriage is a living example of the relationship God wants to have with you; with me. So we could walk into an inviting mystery, that we ought to come out knowing Him better.
We have been brought up, bombarded by false testimony, with vails over our eyes so thick we see things backwards than how they should be. Asking all the wrong questions, seeking all the wrong answers. Why is it that we have failed? Why is it that the body has failed just as much as the secular world? How scary it is for us who are young to have more failure as our role models, than success. To be believing for things we rarely see anyone else accomplish. How must we persevere to see the blessing of Christ, through our own mistakes. How we have to learn from the mistakes of those before us, that we might not make them. Because we’ll never really know what it’s like until we’re there, until we experience it for ourselves. But please, let us use wisdom, for God’s word says that if any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask for it... I rest my doubt in God above having thought, ‘if this wasn’t achievable, then God would not have asked it of us.’
I have a dream... of what I want my marriage to look like. Of course, marriage is not the final goal, it is not the main course in life, but simply an additive to the abundant life God has promised if only we would be so willing as to accept. Yet I cannot write off what lies in my heart, and I fully plan to utilize it, and use it to fight for what is right.
I’m deeply thankful for a couple like my older brother and his newly wedded wife. Never have I seen two people more in love. Where I talked to his wife on the phone a short while ago and asked how marriage was and her honest, warm, sincere reply was, ‘it’s awesome, everyday is like Christmas morning!’ Now of course they’re ‘just married’ but bare with me, I’ve seen couples who are ‘just married’ into the first year and it seems that they’ve been together forever. Their spice is gone, their flavour is gone, the fun seems to be mundane and no longer present. Why does the well dry up and have no more water?
I’m thankful that I have my parents to watch after nearly 30 years of marriage, and they enjoy each other still. Of course, they’re not perfect, of course they’ve made mistakes...yet I can see the smile on my dad’s face when he talks about how he looks forward to going on trips with my mother. How he warms inside and tells how he enjoys her. it’s warming. And he might not know, but I NEED it. I NEED them to love each other. I NEED them to enjoy each other’s precence and to show me and my brothers how we’re suppose to fight through, how we’re suppose to love our wives and cherish them. To respect them and treat them with honor. Because a woman is a special blessing, she truly is God’s final touch. Why can we not see our differences as beautiful, rather than a curse?
Companionship. Commitment. She and she alone I’ll be for. Love. Relationship. Friendship; deep friendship. Fun! Intimacy, in more ways than one. The intimacy of a soft kiss or a gentle touch. the intimacy of the little; the intimacy of the abundant. The gift to explore. I want to cherish her like I’ve never cherished someone before. (Which I also want my level of love for people to increase) I want to ENJOY her company and the essence of her beauty. I want to develop a friendship; a relationship so strong, so intimate that man cannot seperate it. That it may shake, but would never fall. God’s word says, ‘what the Lord has brought together, let man not seperate.’’ Divorce is simply not an option. My words are not doing the justice as my heart is speaking. I want to be head over heals in love, but not blindly in love. I want my marriage to succeed. I want it to thrive. I want my marriage to be blessed, I want my marriage to be saturated; perfumed with the love of God.
God as the head, always, every day, every moment. When days are rough, when days are smooth. Do we run from God because we have a bad day? We shouldn’t. Likewise, running from marriage when you have a bad day is equal. If God can lead me to be a man of God and my wife a woman of God, as Him as the head, ALWAYS, then who can rise against that? Sure, it’ll be challenged, but if it’s firm, it should not fall. Ever.
I believe in marriage; I am eagerly anticipating the day, the entire process, the entire journey. I am excited for it; for it see it’s beauty. I am excited for the companionship, for the union with my best friend. Yet I am not impatient for it, just excited about it!
I believe that it can be achieved and enjoyed! Not that you’ll crawl across the finish line with little air left in your lungs, torn clothes, barely any energy, but rather... dance across the finish line with my wife. Together, hand in hand, smiles on our faces, lit up like the sun because you made it. Because you loved each other, through thick, through thin. Through sickness or disease. Oh, how I need Jesus so strongly to achieve this kind of love. But things is... I believe it. I believe in it. I believe it exists because God exists. Because our love can never go too deep. We can’t match the love of the Father. Learn from our mistakes. Use our mistakes to grow together and with each other.
I have no doubt in my mind that marriage will be ‘hard’, but I would like to believe ‘at times’ that would be true, for if it were true always, why would anyone want to go through with it? Should marriage not be a blessing to be with someone you love? Someone you cherish and enjoy being around? Everything in life requires balance and moderation. Why is it that so few people seem to be able to do this? What is the difference between those who quit and those who persevere?
I don’t want to be afraid, I don’t want to back down, the risk is worth it. I heard a phrase, ‘the worst thing you can do in life is marry the wrong person.’ Use your head, present to God, use common sense, use advice from others, use guidance from mature, Godly sources. Do you mesh? Do you connect? Do you have fun? Are your interests the same? Where are you both going in life? What are your passions? I’m seeing that the most important factor is how you mesh; how you connect. If you’re both on the same level; on the same page.
I’ve rested on the fact that I won’t be told flat out by God who my wife is; that it won’t be that easy to figure it out, and quite frankly, I am not interested in finding out that way. The journey and challenge of figuring this out for yourself is actually fun and exciting. It’s thrilling. Like ripping a piece of paper off of a present from under the Christmas tree on Christmas eve. Just to take a peek, but not knowing what’s inside. Or the light shining over a hilltop, teasing you before it finally reveals itsself; all light warming your face. Surely God is great! Surely God DESIRES blessing for us, it’s written all throughout His word. So should it be as hard as they say? Should it be so rough that it almost doesn’t sound appealing? I refuse to accept that it will be labelled as ‘hard’ but I would rather label it as ‘an adventure waiting to be tapped into it’.
I pray for blessing, I’ll walk with my Lord, and full well know I don’t deserve it, but what do I have in life that I DID deserve? nothing. I deserved to be on that cross that day. Bloodied and bruised. One last breath in my lungs asking God why he forsakened me. So I full well know God wants this, that he delights in this. I look to him who is First and will always remain first in my life. Above my wife, above my own desires. It is a process to be learned. a liftetime to be corrected and taught. He’s a good God, definately. My life, I will live for you Lord, and this desire for a fresh view, a fresh understanding the way YOU see it, the way YOU want it, thrives in my soul. It will birth and providing I stick with my eyes on my God, always, as does my wife, together, we’ll take a journey in life, enjoying the moments, for there’ll be many of them. to love and cherish, to minister together. to cry together, to laugh together, to dance together. This is beautiful, this is intimate. A triangle of intimacy.... I delight in this....
Realization has set in. To feel these passions , seeing that God has given me wisdom and revelation of that on a higher level than I’ve known before. God has allowed me to see a higher standard of living in relationship, in life, and I know there’s even more beyond the horizon. I know I must keep my eyes on God above, but the passion is real and true and healthy. It is right. For marriage is not what life is about, but as I am nearing an age of the option becoming more probably and realistic, I cant help but see what I need to do to prepare. The only reason I have what I have is because God has granted it to me. I thirst for more and the only reason that is because God has showed me a higher level. I am EXTREMELY grateful for what’s been given and taught to me up to this point and I will pursue. God is a good, an awesome God! God, Father, be the head, lead me and guide me to the life you have for me. to the way you want me to live. I’m grateful and thankful. joyus! and humbled! thank-you to the Father, who is glorious above!
Wednesday, June 07, 2006
Unknown Majesty; Thankfulness!
Walk out to a quiet, yet lively pasture
Standing on a hill, staring out over the golden prairies.
the distant land seems to have no end,
The clouds take shape and blissfully decorate the bold, vast blue sky,
together they intertwine to form a masterpiece
Standing on a hill, staring out over the golden prairies.
the distant land seems to have no end,
The clouds take shape and blissfully decorate the bold, vast blue sky,
together they intertwine to form a masterpiece
never to be seen again
The gold, orange and pink colors paint the sunset
The gold, orange and pink colors paint the sunset
beautifully meshing together, stimulating the mind, body and soul.
the sun is bold, blinding, instantly warming on the face
the sun is bold, blinding, instantly warming on the face
and every area of bare skin it so gently touches.
the wind softly rolls throughout the hills,
the wind softly rolls throughout the hills,
swarming every inch, swaying it in a joyus dance
the scent of the sweet grass gives pleasure, bringing a mellow, warming smile upon my face.
My eyes close and I loose myself in the moment.
A tame breeze finds my face, consuming, drapping itself around me whole. -Serenaded - I'm as an ant from the ariel view. I'm delighted in. I am one of kind - his work of art - a crafted specialty.
It is in that moment, that I am over powered. I'm lost in uknown majesty; reveling. I can hear nothing but the wind prowling through the field of grass and wheat. I can hear the bliss of nature at work. My eyes absorb the beauty. I am calmed. I am equable. I am at complete peace.
the scent of the sweet grass gives pleasure, bringing a mellow, warming smile upon my face.
My eyes close and I loose myself in the moment.
A tame breeze finds my face, consuming, drapping itself around me whole. -Serenaded - I'm as an ant from the ariel view. I'm delighted in. I am one of kind - his work of art - a crafted specialty.
It is in that moment, that I am over powered. I'm lost in uknown majesty; reveling. I can hear nothing but the wind prowling through the field of grass and wheat. I can hear the bliss of nature at work. My eyes absorb the beauty. I am calmed. I am equable. I am at complete peace.
complete, blissful peace.
In the midst of circumstance, good or bad, perhaps it’s time for another break. to see what you DO have at the tips of your fingers. To see what blessing God has granted you. I forget (among many things) what God has done for me every, single day. A thankful heart is key, and when it’s genuine and pure, it’s then content and true. Walking home from the gym the other night with the sunset sky, the beauty of a small residential area of city life, it hit me: everything in that moment, what I’m thankful for. I realized some things once more.
I’m thankful for the clean air I can breathe, I’m thankful for the roadways that make it tremendously easy to get to and from. The decorated flowers, grass and trees along the way, bringing peace. I’m thankful for beauty God has showed - I’ve never seen how important it is until now. I’m thankful that I have eyes to see, ears to hear the sounds, the birds, the trees, the wind, children playing ball in the park, thankful I can hear life. that I can smell the many scents from the fresh, cut grass. From the trees, from the flowers that seem to have their own perfume. the smell of ‘fresh’. Fresh air. For all that is calming to an anxious soul.
that I can taste, that I can ‘feel’’ touch. that I can feel textures, that I can feel the intimacy of a simple, soft, touch. thankful for arms and legs so I can physically walk or run. that mybody is healthy, that my body is functioning. Thankful for the body itself, of what I have. what I’ve been granted; none of which I deserved or paid for. All of which was simply given. I could be skinnier, I could be larger, I could be smaller, I could be weaker. I could be unhealthy, I could be too sick to go outside, too sick to enjoy natural creation. Too sick to enjoy friends or family. To sick, the most fun I could have is to stare at a blank, white roof for the rest of my life. Thankful that I have a voice to communicate. Thankful for how easy life actually IS in this case.
Thankful I could walk freely and not in one bit of fear. Thankful for the people I walked past and said ‘hi’ to. I’m not alone! Thankful that they were friendly back! Thankful for silence and beauty. There’s just so much. Incredible amount. Tthis was just on a walk home and I can’t remember what triggered it but it was mostly my body alone what I was thankful for, what all is involved in that, that works, that doesn’t necessarily have to. that may fail. but I have these, and I take them for granted at times. The thought of loosing my legs brings anguish alone. let alone, my sight or my hearing. These are beautiful, beautiful gifts we have little to no control over keeping. If they were completely taken away, it wouldn’t matter what a doctor could say or do, or what perscription could be given.
Thankful that I was born in Canada. I could’ve been born in Africa with AIDS before I even had a chance to live. That I got an education so i could learn essential and basic skills and more. That I KNOW i’ll always have food for the day, clothes, and a place to lay my head at night. My issues begin to shrink. They begin to be put into perspective. I’m humbled as I’m surrounded by the thought of what I actually DO have on a daily basis and those small things in life I whine, snivel and complain about. I have nothing to complain about. We’re very rich. Thankful for the safety and the environment. These parks and lakes were made, were put here because God gave man an idea. Thankful for people who pursue their dreams. Everything around you is the result of someone’s dream they followed through with, to bring to life. Think if you had to establish something as big as a city and you were looking at an open field; barren land, with nothing but the clothes on your back. Big operation? My issues are really none to complain about at all.
Tonight I’ll get to play baseball. I wont have to worry if my family will survive the night from violence or from starvation. That I know they’ll be resting infront of the tv after a day of work. that my body will even allow me to have that source of fun and relaxation. I could go on, but it’s the point of the matter. Eminem said it best ”Loose yourself... in the moment...don’t you ever let it go”
“Don’t forget your Egypt” - don’t forget where you came from. Don’t you forget what God gave you. We always need a thankful heart, and I’m just plain thankful that I get times such as these, where I’m lost in mentality, yet in the physical world, that I can be shown all I truly have. There’s far more I could write that I see, far more that I’m even aware of...that we can pick out, that we can pick apart.
Jesus, sincerely.... from the bottom of my heart.... thank-you....for everything... that you've done, doing and will do. Not because I deserve it, but because you love me...
Thursday, June 01, 2006
Friendly Reminders!
The human mind can be one of my biggest enemies. It works for me and yet against me. Throw in a mix of human nature and you've officially got yourself a mess!
Lately I've seemed to move mylsef into anxiousness with my life and my circumstances and current situations. The summer, the fall, where life is going, etc. It's relieving in a small sense to see others who are also wondering the same thing, 'what am I going to do with my life?' - that we all have this same question. But we've also got the insight of accepting and loving your present. Where you are now. Not so much of being content but 'enjoying' where you are now.
Times in my life I forget to stop and actually ENJOY where I'm at. Enjoy the day, enjoy the time, enjoy the people, the friends, the family, enjoy what you've got TODAY. Enjoy your relationships.
I cry out to God as to what I'm suppose to do with this and that, and over there, and a friend speaks to me a friendly reminder that God gave me a brain and wisdom, so he doesn't have to tell me what exactly to do all the time. But there's the part of figuring it out for yourself, meanwhile, God is right there the entire time.
I push myself into worry and feel anxious and cause my own anxiety and discomfort.
Relax & enjoy - keeps coming back at me and for some reason, I've been forgetting about it. I don't want to look back on my life and see I forgot to enjoy because I was so worried of making a mistake.
A man who takes no risk in life is a dead man. Life is adventurous with risks that are properly thought out and respected, not foolishly ran into hoping for a positive outcome. Life is boring without risk.
I feel at peace finally today from a conversation over lunch with a good friend. To be reminded to relax and enjoy. use wisdom and what God has already given to me. That he won't always tell you the answers. Peace came back, and after prayer I feel released. Peace returned! But like you, I'm just one person. I'm just one man, trying to find his way through life, chasing after God and his way, teetering right or left to find that straight path. Mistakes I do make.
I would much rather ask God FIRST and go through a mistake to find out something as small as this for an answer, rather than not ask God at all and move forward to reap that seed. No thanks, I'll take this instead!
Enjoy, Enjoy, Enjoy.your path, your process, your situations, your circumstance, your summer plans, the people around you. Life!
Lately I've seemed to move mylsef into anxiousness with my life and my circumstances and current situations. The summer, the fall, where life is going, etc. It's relieving in a small sense to see others who are also wondering the same thing, 'what am I going to do with my life?' - that we all have this same question. But we've also got the insight of accepting and loving your present. Where you are now. Not so much of being content but 'enjoying' where you are now.
Times in my life I forget to stop and actually ENJOY where I'm at. Enjoy the day, enjoy the time, enjoy the people, the friends, the family, enjoy what you've got TODAY. Enjoy your relationships.
I cry out to God as to what I'm suppose to do with this and that, and over there, and a friend speaks to me a friendly reminder that God gave me a brain and wisdom, so he doesn't have to tell me what exactly to do all the time. But there's the part of figuring it out for yourself, meanwhile, God is right there the entire time.
I push myself into worry and feel anxious and cause my own anxiety and discomfort.
Relax & enjoy - keeps coming back at me and for some reason, I've been forgetting about it. I don't want to look back on my life and see I forgot to enjoy because I was so worried of making a mistake.
A man who takes no risk in life is a dead man. Life is adventurous with risks that are properly thought out and respected, not foolishly ran into hoping for a positive outcome. Life is boring without risk.
I feel at peace finally today from a conversation over lunch with a good friend. To be reminded to relax and enjoy. use wisdom and what God has already given to me. That he won't always tell you the answers. Peace came back, and after prayer I feel released. Peace returned! But like you, I'm just one person. I'm just one man, trying to find his way through life, chasing after God and his way, teetering right or left to find that straight path. Mistakes I do make.
I would much rather ask God FIRST and go through a mistake to find out something as small as this for an answer, rather than not ask God at all and move forward to reap that seed. No thanks, I'll take this instead!
Enjoy, Enjoy, Enjoy.your path, your process, your situations, your circumstance, your summer plans, the people around you. Life!
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